Arsene Wenger is actually an Indian!!!!!!!!!! Part I. Guide to Arsenal Transfer Window

Indians are the Masters of Jugaad

Jugaad (alternatively Juggaar) is a colloquial Hindi-Urdu word that can mean an innovative fix or a simple workaround, used for solutions that bend rules, or a resource that can be used as such, or a person who can solve a complicated issue. It is used as much to describe enterprising street mechanics as for political fixers. This meaning is often used to signify creativity to make existing things work or to create new things with meager resources.

No explanations needed here.

Masters of Jugaad

Masters of Jugaad

Arsene Wenger has some innovative and amazing conversions. Robin Van Persie, Kolo Toure and Thierry Henry conversions were stroke of a Genius. Many other conversions cannot be considered as a genius move, they are just Jugaads. There are so many examples of his Jugaad work in terms of transfers, loan, formation and player positions. Yossi Benayoun on loan from Chelsea, Playing Arshavin as a main striker, Ramsey as Right Back and Of course playing anyone at Left wing. Starting from Nasri to Ozil, almost every player played on the Left wing, Arsene even played Lord Bendtner at Right wing. Getting a player on Loan from Chelsea and finishing above them in the league, now that is called a real Jugaad.

There are countless examples to prove that Arsene Wenger is a real master of Jugaads. Re-signing Sol, Flamini, Thierry etc….. Bow to our Jugaad Master.

 Bargain sale in a Shopping Mall

Indians are cheap, but the current boom in the IT sector has made them open then wallets and credit cards quite often. The boom has not changed everything. Shopping in huge shopping malls and branded stores has become a regular activity. Still, there is a small difference. We go to the Luxury Branded store in a mall and walk straight to the clearance or discount sale section instead of New arrivals. When the whole world is queued up for the release of the any new apple product, Indians will be looking if there is any bargain deals available for Samsung or other Android phones during the time of Apple release.

Arsenal fans were calling and praying for Arsene Wenger to sign Mario Gotze in 2012. Arsene Wenger went to the red hot super mall of talents. He went to Borussia Dortmund and bought Thomas Eisfeld at a clearance sale in January 2012. There were so many great players in BvB.  Arguments can be made for the number of players available for sale, but look at the number of players that left BvB. It was the same case with Gervinho when Hazard was available.

Chinese Phones and Indians

India is a huge market for Chinese Gadgets. To the extent we go on comparing a Chinese mobile to a branded mobile is unimaginable. This is a common scenario in offices when Videocon and few other companies introduced their own Chinese phones. Touch Screen, Dual Sim, Battery and the most important thing price. The Chinese phones looked really like a shiny new toy at the beginning. People went on and on about the features and advantages of their new toy. How intelligent, they were to buy those for cheap instead of paying huge sum just for a mobile phone. It only takes six months to understand the reliability and the actual cost of the phone. Only after six months we realize that it’s not easy to sell a second hand chinese mobile

Arsene Wenger has done the same. Chamakh, Bendtner, Park, Santos, Sanogo etc… The bargain buy list is almost endless. Arsenal fans understand the financial constraints at Arsenal, but Arsene Wenger went over board with his 50millions striker and quality players. Just like the Chinese phones it only took six months to realize the real potential of our Chinese level players. Most of them failed and Arsene really struggled to ship many of them out because of the fat contracts. Its understandable that certain bargain buys does not work, but to justify the quality on every interview was really embarrassing. Most of the players who left could not even prove themselves in lower EPL teams or in any other inferior leagues Where is Chamakh, Denilson, Bendtner, Park, Santos?????????

Exams Vs Deadline Day

That is called Studying

That is called Studying

Either it is project work or any exams, Indians tend to leave plenty of work incomplete during the final stages of the project or any other work in general. The clock ticks much faster for Indians on the day before the delivery of any project or Examination. The amount of work done in a few days before the deadline day is much larger compared to the work done during the initial days of the project. In the end they are good at achieving the bare minimum, i.e. pass mark or delivering a project with some bugs.

That is called Signing

That is called Signing

Managers like Alex Ferguson, Jose Mourinho, Pep Gaudiola etc… Dive into the market much earlier and make the necessary purchase much earlier. They tend to bully the seller and get the job done. The top clubs and managers sweep the creamy layer much earlier leaving the scraps for the rest. Although Arsenal is one of the top clubs in Europe, the attitude of Arsene Wenger is just like an Indian Engineering Student.

Arsene - The EngineerThis Article was written to have some fun. Don’t think too much, just make some comparisons Indians you might laugh yourselves.

0-2 : Man City Vs Arsenal Match Report. Francis Coquelin – New leader emerges

Arsenal began the game from where they left off against Stoke city. Arsenal played a high intensity game against a better team in terms of quality. Stoke were nasty and there were some high intense tackles flew around, but the match against Manchester city was more about the technical quality of Arsenal team, they combined it with their energy. It was clearly evident from the starting line up and the way Arsenal started the match that Arsenal badly wanted a win just like they did against Stoke city FC.

Arsenal record against top four teams were really embarrassing. Although Arsenal started this season with a win against MCFC 3-0 in the Community Shield, but lost 2-0 lead in the EPL match at Emirates and ended the game at 2-2. Arsenal had lot at stake but Abu Dhabi club has the danger of drifting away from their Russian rivals in the EPL race. Weekend football results were least favorable for Arsenal. Every possible result went against Arsenal.

Thank god. Just only one DM

Thank god. Just only one DM

Surprisingly Arsenal started a team identical to that of team that started against Stoke. Bellerin replaced the injured Debuchy and Aaron Ramsey replaced Thomas Rosicky in the starting line up. Thankfully there was no Flamini in the starting line up. Coquelin and Ospina deservedly kept their place in the starting line up. Arsenal has wealth of midfielder in their squad but it was always puzzling when they start the match with Flamini and Arteta.

First Half

Koscielny picked up an early yellow but Arsenal started the match brightly. Arsenal Midfield was full of energy and played a high intensity game. Arsenal team took the fight to Etihad. There was no holding back. Sanchez was threatening, Giroud came close but he could not make it count. The neat passing between Sanchez, Ramsey, Monreal and Giroud made Vincent Kompany to make his usual rugy tackle on Nacho. Manuel pellegini thought it was a dive in his post match interview. WTF Manuel, it was a stone wall penalty, but with Arsenal’s luck with referee decisions fans were surprised that the referee gave us the penalty. Santi stepped up and scored. The joyful Arsenal fans had to go through some nervous moments during the final few minutes of the first half. Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain was clearly not in the level of Ramsey, Santi, Coquelin and sanchez, he kept losing the ball putting the team under pressure.

Second Half

History suggest that Arsenal fans can never rest, even when they were leading 4-0 at the end of first half, but this team was not nervous, they continued their dominance. Man City made some changes replacing the underrated James Milner. The Ox was replaced as expected. Though he had his moments but kept losing the balls putting the team under pressure. Hard working Sanchez was fouled by Jovetic. Awesome Santi stepped up again to deliver the dead ball into the box. Man city were known for their defense, but there was some chaos in organizing the defense for the free kick, Giroud took full advantage of it and headed the ball in. The goal made the fans go wild, but his celebrations would have made the day for the ladies. Kompany stayed on the pitch in spite of his tackle on Alexis. Flamini could have made it 3-0, but at the end it was a good win for Arsenal with a clean sheet.

The players were really knackered. Ramsey was visibly tired at 85th minute. Everyone’s hard work paid off.

Players

Santi dance

Man of the Match : Santi Cazorla. He did everything in style.

Flop of the Match : Alex oxlade-Chamberlain

It was not a good day for Ox. Bellerin and Ospina played well. The attacking threat of Bellerin will increase in multiple folds when Arsenal players starts to trust him little more. Coquelin was a real leader on the pitch. He continued his fine form and he is going to keep his place in the starting line up. His passion and awareness was really good. The 23 year old was instructing, shouting, tackling, intercepting but most importantly kept his cool.

Well done lads.

Plan A always works for Arsenal. Why Cheick Tiote will be a good addition to Arsenal?

FA Cup Round 3 -Arsenal vs Hull – 04 Jan 2015

After the disappointing start to the 2015, it seems Arsenal are back again to the winning ways. Arsenal are a team to watch when Plan A works perfectly. Everything goes south when Plan A does not work. Arsenal played some beautiful football against Hull. Though the score is only 2-0 it does not say the complete story. Arsenal could have scored 3-4 goals in the first half alone. The artistic and beautiful flow of football was visible during the first half of the match.

Match Summary

Arsenal Started the match with a strongest possible 11. Though there were couple of changes no surprise inclusions or omissions. Joel Campbell, Walcott and Coquelin were the only non-regular starters included in the starting 11. The team looked very strong with youngsters sitting on the bench. Traditionally Arsene wenger used to field few of those youngsters but luckily Arsene is quite serious about retaining the FA cup. We fielded a strong and started brightly unlike our opponents.

We started the match well. Joel Campbell made some intelligent runs. Coquelin kept things neat and tidy. Ospina was really solid when called upon. The Plan A of Arsenal style of Play really worked against Hull. Arsenal enjoyed lots of possession and always threatening to score goals in the first half. Sanchez, Cazorla and Rosicky really combined well. Run from Rosicky made our midfield very fluid and instantly triggered our attack once the ball reached his feat. Team really looked good and almost everyone were doing their job. The game looked much simpler.

Midfield

Sanchez was our man, he was everywhere. He kept the Midfield together. He was the all action star of the Arsenal team. His work rate never keeps him away from midfield, defense and attack. Arsenal team always plays through the middle. He was the key through the middle. He is a defender, midfielder and centre forward packed into one player. Its like having an additional player on the pitch. His work rate is mind blowing. We also need to rest him sometime. Hopefully the trio of Ozil, Walcott and Giroud will step up.

Wings

Monreal and Bellerin played well. Bellerin is an exciting player, he is really brave, fast and technical too. If he improves on his defensive side then we will have one hell of a player for years. Joel and Walcott had some wonderful chances. They also made some interesting runs into the box. The understanding between the wingers and full backs were lacking during the attack. The exchange of passes were not so great or may be it was completely overshadowed by our centre midfield. Wing play was completely ignored and there was no one in the box to receive the crosses from our exciting right back. The wingers understood their role and were always trying to cut inside and exchange places.

Defense

The Defense looked solid. Ospina looked assured. Hopefully he will start next few games and prove to be our number one. Chambers, Mertesacker, Bellerin and Monreal were good. Chambers, BFG and Coq were really solid. Apart from few misplaced passes Coquelin looked very assured. Hopefully his confidence will increase with this clean sheet performance and improve him as a defensive midfield player.

Goals

Some of the amazing chances did not produce any end product in the first half. Mertesacker headed home for our first from a corner. The man of the match Sanchez turned and fired the second goal to send us through to the next round.

Transfer Window

Arsenal fans were always ambitious when it comes to the transfer window. They fall for every rumour and feel disappointed at the end of the transfer window. Though Arsenal did well during the summer transfer window, their shortcomings were clearly visible. Does the Arsenal squad needs any replacement. After watching the Hull Match it might feel like we may not need anyone. At least one position requires a top quality player. Arsenal team would benefit from a really solid and strong DM player.

Role of CDM at Arsenal

The match against Hull was the perfect example why Arsene does not fancy a traditional strong Defensive Midfielder? Its also a match where the Plan A worked completely. Arsenal Struggle only against big teams who over run our midfield with pace and power. Coquelin did well against Hull. He was good in the match. In the overall match the role of coquelin/CDM was quite limited. There was hardly any counter attacking from Hull which made Coquelin look like an Arteta replacement rather than a Defensive midfield Player. Role of Arteta is underrated, he is the organizer and passer coordinating between the defense and attacking midfield. So, as per Arsenal style of play we do not need a Defensive minded midfield player. We only need a very good leader with passing skills.

Why Arsenal needs a Destroyer?

One Stone can cause a ripple effect.

One Stone can cause a ripple effect.

Arsenal will continue to struggle against teams that gets little physical. Too many nice and soft players are already in our team. Arsenal definitely needs a destroyer who can put their body on the line to test the physicality of our opponents. Currently Flamini does that role for Arsenal, but does he have the legs to do it during counter attack?

Our flow of football can be easily disturbed by pushing one midfielder into the ground. Physical teams does it every single time. Big teams hurt us with counter attacking. Jose Mourinho has a text book method to defeat Arsenal easily. BBC MOTD highlighted this year how chelsea players kicked Arsenal players every now and then to disturb our flow of play. Once our flow is disturbed then its easy to win games against Arsenal. The easier way to win against Arsenal is to disturb the flow of football.

Whole Arsenal team and squad is prepared to play the football in only one way, the Arsenal way.  Too many similar players. Does it really hurt to have a midfield destroyer with limited technical ability. I strongly believe one midfield destroyer can become vital to our squad. A world class DM would be really good but realistically I do not believe Arsene is planning to replace the club captain. A DM can help us against bigger teams and smaller physical teams. DM can also be handy in protecting the lead during the final few minutes. Its not surprising to see that we cannot defend our lead consistently. It would not hurt Arsenal to have someone like Cheik Tiote in our squad.

Cheick Tiote Bargain deal – The Real Arsene Way 🙂

Arsene Wars : The FORCE AWAKENS. Time to Order the Statue for Arsene Wenger

Arsenal Vs Stoke City 2-3

There is nothing to talk about the game. Its the same case for several years.

1. We start well

2. Concede goals

3. Chase the game

4. Score few goals

5. Lose the Game fighting.

In the game against stoke there was only one difference. We skipped the point one and started with point two. After that its the same story.

Everyone knew Arsenal team is a very good team in Europe. Only Arsenal fans will argue that its one of the top teams in the world football right now. The facts, opinions, FFP, financial argument, big spending etc.. are slowly fading away. The poker game of Arsene wenger is coming to an end. Sad times but its true. The Fans and pundits were proven right again and again. Arsene wenger is not changing anything to prove them wrong. There is no need for him to change his style. He has got too much powers. We always defend our beloved manager for what he has done to this club. He is simply the greatest manager of Arsenal. I can only hope he does not damage his own legacy.

If not for this single Incident. Arsenal would have won the match easily,

If not for this single Incident. Arsenal would have won the match easily,

Arsenal is a Mid Table Team

The usual case of shambolic defending pops up every now and then. This is the not the first time we are leaking goals in every direction. The pathetic display of our performance will be forgotten once we have couple of wins in next few matches and crawl our way towards top four. I am huge Arsenal Fan, few years ago I was arguing hours defending wenger and slating players like Fabregas, RVP etc… I am running out of excuses. I am not winning any argument. The will to defend my own club is fading. We were bullied throughout the pitch. Big teams hurt us with their quality and strike power. Small teams hurt us by playing dirty. We are not strong enough to defend against smaller teams and also we are not good enough to win against big teams. We are a mid table team with a good manager. He used to be great.

How to be a Happy Gunner?

I developed a formula to be a Happy Gunner. Its Arsene’s Guide to a Happy Gunner

1. Always live in the past

2. Be deluded and think the squad is best. Be happy when other teams lose.

3. Blame the referee and rest of the world for the defeat

4. Always talk about FFP, Big spending Clubs, greedy players and young future stars.

5. Celebrate Fourth Place Trophy

Anybody in their right might will not question the Loyalty and contribution of Arsene Wenger to this football club. He brought most supporters into this club. Its sad that many of those supporters are turning against him.

Statue for Arsene Wenger

Its time to order that Bronze statue for the man who transformed Arsenal football club into one of the greatest club in the world. I don’t he will even achieve the level of his past success at this club. Its time to say good bye to our classy manager. He should have moved upstairs after the FA cup glory. I hope he wins another trophy this season. I wanna see this man have a great farewell. There is no way he is going to be sacked. Either he retires or moves upstairs paying way for some other manager to take the team forward. He deserves a better farewell. Keep your Arseneout banners out  of Emirates stadium.

Is Arsene’s English Obsession costing Arsenal? Start convincing yourself for 4th place trophy.

I am not against any English players, but just playing them ahead of Sanchez and Santi is really sick. After the failure of Youth project, Arsene has a new pet project in his hands. British youth obsession. Is it really an obsession or Arsene wenger is believing the hype placed on the English shoulders. The french man’s most successful era was with his own national players. French core won us several trophies, but his current obsession with English players is costing us several points.

tottenham lineup

Though the line up showed ozil on the middle, he was actually playing from the LW. Six English players in our starting line up. I do not doubt the quality of certain first team English Players. Gibbs, Ramsey and Chambers has proven themselves. Welbeck is the only proven premier league striker available at our disposal. Its only English obsession to start Jack and Ox ahead of Santi and Sanchez.

Santi is one of our most consistent player. Time and time again he has proven his importance at Arsenal. Arsene wanted to prove right of his obsession. This is not league up to throw away. This was the most emotional match of the season. Arsene’s obsession is above everything. We have to accept it and live with it.

Arsenal Vs Tottenham

Santi Cazorla and Alexis Sanchez should have started our attack. This is north london derby for god’s sake. We should be spanking our mid table neighbours. Arsenal is a very strong offensive team. Their attack is always dangerous until the ball reaches the opposition goal keeper. Once the ball gets closer to the opposition keeper the attack becomes flat. We have seen this for several years. There is no clean striker of the ball. Passing the ball into the net always gets us close to goal of the season but nowhere near to any trophy.

There is nothing new in the way Arsenal plays these days. Its the same old beautiful football without any actual purpose. We are known for conceding stupid goals and giving away the leads. Flamini lost the ball in our own half and spurs scores. What a surprise defending? Our defense gives us the illusion they were strong, but they always find stupid ways to leak goals.

Killer Instinct

Dominant football without any end product. Conceding goals always wakes up Arsene and Arsenal team. There is something seriously wrong with this Arsenal team. May be this is the reason we have not won many trophies. Zero killer Instinct. Having football without any threat to opposition goal. Our way of football ignores the fact that there is a goal keeper guarding the post.

We pulled one back once we had Santi and Sanchez on the pitch. There is no point talking about injuries. Its same old Arsenal.

Its really surprising that two of our former goal keepers managed to keep clean sheets but the only one failed is our number one goal keeper. We can keep blaming players like Ozil, Podolski etc… but We will continue to remain the same until we change the manager.

4th Place Trophy

If Ozil played well with Welbeck through the middle then why would you change that? There is a limit to your obsession Arsene. We have already lost 8 points in the league. There is only one person to be blamed. I really hope Arsene wenger leaves Arsenal soon without tainting his legacy.

North London Derby – The girls did it before and now it’s time for the boys.

Derby

There is nothing more than fun than watching Arsenal ripping Tottenham apart for any Arsenal Fan. Arsenal team faces one of the most important rivals in the Premier league. Though its only the belief of Tottenham fans that they are our rivals, I certainly does not think they are of such an importance. They are just another local rival. We are above them and should always aim higher which obviously mean we should kick them every time.

Knowing Arsenal its no guarantee that we will defeat Tottenham. We win against Barcelona and lose against Birmingham. Its always hot and cold for Arsenal. Every Arsenal player will be pumped up for this match. Its a chance to become an instant hero among the fans. Come on Lads

We have always finished above Tottenham. Though Arsenal have better record against Spurs, they also had some very bad performances. I don’t want tomorrow to be one of those days. We are an offensive team lets destroy them.

If case if you are a new Arsenal fan, here is a little bit of history lesson for you.

Tottenham as usual has a new team with new manager. Even spending 100 million did not do them any good. Arsenal core has not changed much. We have strengthened our team offensively which means more goals.

Arsene Wenger

“Ozil played very well against Aston Villa and showed a good understanding with Danny Welbeck,” Wenger said.

“There is a good partnership there, they gave each other goals to score and it was an interesting experience.

“It is tempting to keep him in that central role but I maintain he will play where needed for the balance of the team and that can change game by game.”Tottenham as usual has a new team with new manager. Even spending 100 million did not do them any good. Arsenal core has not changed much. We have strengthened our team offensively which means more goals.

Play Ozil as CB – I don’t care, just win the match. Come on Arsene you can do better than feeding something for fans and media to debate about. This is one of the most important match for Arsenal fans. Just play the best possible team and tear them apart. Play anyone anywhere and win the match. I am least bothered about the players and positions for this match as long us the result is good.

The Ox

Internet fans were celebrating Gibbs birthday with Ox’s photo. We have to love the creativity of our fans. Its just little rude that Gibbs gets a Red card and OX goes on to get the birthday cake too.

“Alexis and Jack played 90 minutes the other day and they’re usually on second-day recovery,” Chamberlain told Arsenal Player.

“But today Alexis really wanted to train and people had to tell him to take it easy.

Bxasmy-IQAAISkvUnleash the Beast

Ox if possible please follow Alexis else think about finding a new club soon. I really hated his statement regarding the training of Sanchez. Though he might have said it in a funny way, I don’t see it that way. You are yet to prove yourself as an Arsenal team player. The Ox is still enjoying his extended honeymoon period, which is available only to British players at Arsenal. If podolski should be shown the exit door soon, then players like Ox should also be the next one in the line unless he proves himself. Walcott and Ramsey too had their honeymoon period. It will end sooner than you think Ox, Better you step up. If Gervinho had a similar honeymoon period, he would have been with us. Who knows, he might have found his shooting boots.

Stan Kroenke is no Vincent Tan. Just 3 Million out. This is Modern day Football. Deal with it.

Gone are the days of pure sports. Domestic Leagues in any game is not just about the game. The brand is bigger than the game itself. We are not living in the age where ticket prices alone covers the running cost of the sports. Each sport has its own value. Popularity determines the revenue. There are thousands of revenue streams for any sports.The commercial aspect of the game has vast potential. Big teams with big money always wins trophies. Ask any Chelsea or Manchester city fans.

Not just Football. Its a Business.

Arsenal Football club is not a national club. Its a Domestic English club with global presence. Its a global brand. It has a reputation and fan base to keep up. Players does not join a club based on their love alone. Big money always attracts the best players. Every fan pays for the club. The club is sold to the global audience. This is not just football, it a huge football business. Money is the global language spoken at any sporting event.

venkysWe bought a club which used to play in the Premier League

Stan Kroenke took 3m Out – Big Deal.

As a fan it just pains to see money being taken out. Fans cannot decide the way the club is run or businesses are done. We show our displeasure, but we need to accept that there is nothing illegal happening here. If you think Stan Kroenke invested several around 600million pounds just for the love of the club then you need to check your head examined. Its just a business for them. They expect dividend for their investment. Its only logical that money is being taken out by them. The club wanted his investment but does not want to pay interest for his investments. Totally illogical.

Stan Kroenke is no Vincent Tan

I do not support Stan Kroenke for taking money out of the club. Do I wish there was some other better investor for our club? yes I do, but there are so many clueless investors buying clubs. Few clubs were bought as a rich kids toy. In an ideal world the club should be owned by fans. We do not live in an ideal world. We should be glad that we were owned by Kroenke instead of Vincent Tan or Venky’s.

vincent tanMy toy and my colour

Stan Kroenke is a business man and he has left the football side of the club to the manager and other professionals. Its better to have someone like Kroenke than Vincent Tan. Venky’s bought Blackburn rovers and they were not seen anywhere close to the premier League. Sam was sacked by them and he is still managing an EPL team. We also know about Man united owners taking money out of the club to buy the club.

Fan’s Perspective

As a fan we cannot dictate the club on everything. Arsene wenger has proven time and time again that Fans were wrong. Like every other business the football clubs should be run by professionals. The investors has every right to fiddle with their toys. Lets not abuse Stan Kroenke for taking 3m out of the club. He is going to take larger money in the future. We cannot stop it. Its totally legal. We can only hope he takes out smaller amount without affecting the football side of the club.